Did you know that Effective Communication plays a vital role in the success of every professional and personal relationship? Research has shown that our ability to communicate effectively with others does more good than any other skill that we may have or develop.
What we accomplish in our career and in our personal life is determined largely by how well we can communicate with others and how effective we are in inspiring others
to take action.
Good performance at work with a lacklusture communication skill will not grant you success professionally. However, there are numerous examples of people who are extremely successful just because of their ability to communicate with other people.
Good communication skill generally means the ability to be understood. However, to be a good communicator, we need to be a good conversationalist as well and that is much more than just being able to communicate our ideas to others.
Most of the difficulties among human beings, and people within organizations are caused by breakdowns in the communication process. Either people do not clearly say what they really mean or others do not understand the message the way it was intended and the problems start from there…
Now, the great news is that effective communication skill is a learned skill. Everybody can learn this number one recepie for success with people. There are plenty of avenues to learn and practice your communication skills everyday. However, here are a few top elements of any communication to observe and start improving upon right from this moment on:
Ability To Listen
As human beings, we all like to talk. We all like to be understood. But that is where the problem is. Did you know you are learning only when you are listening? The more you speak, the less you learn. It is one of the most important element of communication and personal development.
Also, how well you listen has a major impact on your job effectiveness, and on the quality of your relationships with other people. People love people who listen well. This could be a blessing if we choose to.
Ability To Ask Great Questions
Your ability to ask good questions is connected to your professional development. At your job, at home, or while interacting with others in a networking event, the people who have developed the art of asking great open ended questions are always at ease, confident and engage well with their audience.
Research shows that asking great questions has proven to be a great tool for motivating others to take action. This skill can pay huge dividends if enough attention is given to develop it.
Selection of Words
Words only account for 7 % of any message, research has shown. However, an effective communication needs this 7% to be effective. Words become extremely important when it comes to written communication since the reader only can see the words, nothing else would matter.
If there isn't any congruency, the receiver will be confused. Therefore, it is important to watch the words we choose while we communicate with others.
The Tone And Emphasis
The emphasis and tone have the power to completely change the message that is being communicated. Often, you will say something to a person and they may become offended. When you express that the words you used were intended to be inoffensive, the other person will tell you that it was your tone of voice that was the issue. I have found myself in that situation on more occassions than I can count.
The Body Language
More than 50% of your communication is your body language. Isn't that amazing?
While speaking to somebody, if you can face the person directly and give them direct eye contact, combined with fully-focused attention, you double the impact of what you're saying.
While listening to others, leaning forward, giving them a steady eye-contact in a respectful gesture and nodding your head occassionally gives the speaker an impression that you are paying them the attention.
Here are a few books I recommend that I found very helpful in understanding and improving on our day-to-day communication with others:
-
Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone
-
Just Ask!
-
The Definitive Book of Body Language
Question: What communication challenges you have found while dealing with people in your family, friends or coworkers? What aspect of communication you feel is the most important to cultivating great relationships with others?
I think one of the key points you’ve touched upon here, Kumar, is our ability to LISTEN.
Of course, we need to be SILENT to do that. The reason intentional listening is so important is because others want to be heard. They want to know that they make a contribution and that they matter. If they are not listened to, they do not feel appreciated.
How we come across to others, I refer to as “The Spirit of Communication.”
Either we are mean-spirited and put others down, or we are kind-hearted and lift up and encourage others.
So listen with the EAR in the middle of your hEARt as I tell you Kumar…
I highly esteem your friendship and your valuable contribution to my life.
Warm Regards,
Bill
You are so absolutely right Bill. The internal peace is what needed to be silent on the outside and to be able to pay attention to what others are saying. Listening to somebody attentively is very difficult if internal noise is too much.
And THANK YOU so much for always blessing me with your kind words. We cherish your friendship so much.
Regards,
Kumar
Hi Kumar… In your reply, you mention “IF” internal noise is too much…
In your article above in “The Body Language” section, you’ve mentioned what I believe is the answer … “fully-focused attention.”
Yes, I agree that internal noise can pose a challenge to one’s focus… yet if we regard what the speaker has to say as MOST IMPORTANT, we make greater efforts to pay close attention, and squelch any internal noise.
It has been my experience that being an intentional listener brings the reward of understanding a person better. Colleen and I spent a whole day listening to a lady who lost her husband recently, and we know how good it made her feel just to release a lot of emotions pent up on the inside. In the process, we learned quite a bit about her and a lot of little bits of life wisdom from a different perspective.
You are VERY welcome! I love many things about you, especially that you are a kind-hearted, wise man. We’re certainly on the same page when it comes to cherishing your friendship also.
Blessings!
Practice is also important to sharpen these skills. Developing communication skills begins with simple interactions. Communication skills can be practiced every day in settings that range from the social to the professional. New skills take time to refine, but each time you use your communication skills, you open yourself to opportunities and future partnerships.
Thank you for this very informative post. I happened to come to this blog through a quotation and felt the need to appreciate your great work.
Thanks,
Mike
Thank you Mike. Appreciate you taking time to add a couple of valuable lines.
Just Ask has been my favorite books since one of our family friends recommended this book to Kumar a few years ago. We have gifted this book to bunch of friends and everybody enjoyed the lessons learnt. I highly recommend this book no matter what professional background one may have.
Communication skills are vital to my business. I coach people by phone how to make money online. I didn’t start out that way. I had to listen to other coaches and people who showed me what to do, then by trial and error I developed a system that could help others out. Hopefully now they can bypass my mistakes and become successful faster. But it all happens through listening and responding in ways that make people feel important and know that their business is important to me.
Hi Kumar, I realize this is more business oriented, but we have a post that is also related to communication, that you might like. It focuses more on relationship communication, but I think that it doesn’t really matter who you’re speaking to, good communication skills are good communication skills!
I think our posts actually go hand in hand, and can be used together. I’d go so far as to say that there is some overlap. In any event, this is a great post. Keep up the good work.
Effective communication is the key of success not only business but in personal life.you suggest really great ideas which are helpful for good communication.